My relationship with AMS is strained these days. What used to be beautiful, fully committed on both sides, suddenly seems like I’m the desperate and needy one with a partner who’s gone off the boil.
It’s frustrating …
Ever since the first week in December I’ve been getting excited when I could see that someone had bought or borrowed Chocolates in the Ocean. It was wonderful to see it out and alive in the world. When I saw new stats, I wondered who was reading it, how they felt, if they liked it. I adored seeing that those who borrowed it seemed to just read and read till they were finished.
So I refresh the stats page and I keep my fingers crossed, and I sigh when there’s nothing.
Reminds me of when I was sixteen and would run to a pay phone at lunch time to call home and ask my mother if there was any post for me. A letter from the one I loved … Let’s just say Please Mr Postman was on the mixed tape I made for my walkman.
But it is still wonderful. Knowing it’s out there. Knowing that people are reading my book, entering into the world I created. Maybe they are also craving chocolate and a Great Dane.
Before my next refresh, I’ll get back to writing the sequel.
Next weekend I’ll be on Langeland again. Walking past Anne’s house. With my great-grandmother’s house right across the street. It’s all fiction, but we all have to get our inspiration from somewhere…